poMotion poetry

Work in progress

with 4 comments

I have sat in noisy rooms of telephone wire begging ghosts for pennies
I have hauled ass through cars and pedestrians honking   charging with flaming red sauce meant for upper floor apartments
I have gotten drunk and drove top speed down US 36 vomiting out the window crying

I locked my self in bedrooms, bedrooms, bedrooms staying one step ahead of the on coming onslaught of company
went dancing but ended up making out at a bus stop, lost on new adventures
been broken by the glowing howling fuck called love
but was stupid enough to do it again

I have thought and wandered…
why
what if
only to wake up sweaty in a puddle
totally lost on acid in 99% humidity not sure if it was raining or not, worried that they would know:
what if I had no job and woke at ten to a cheerio’s bong?!
what if I tossed out all my books for class because I realized they had never seen the things they claimed to explain?!
what if I stayed up all night reading anarchist lit discovering that I was an anarchist all along

Once as a kick I worked for two years in a ballpark
hotdogs beer pretzels
the repeated remarks about how much this costs or how much that costs while throwing money at me
I winked as I shoved their money in my pocket
this place pulls in thousands a night they won’t miss a few hundred, I consoled myself while smoking my menthol cigarette

then while delivering in a red toy car, I peddled round disks of Italian ‘pride’ to the mansions where they kept their money tight and under surveillance
and laughed, as only the poor can laugh, at their stupidity

in rented vans I have seen corn fields, flashing police car lights and snow
jumping out to put on snow chains only to discover we don’t know how to put on snow chains
fumbling around with frozen hands while wiping snow from the Japanese instructions
but not caring, knowing this is the best trip I have ever taken
sleeping on the floor of an abandoned theater full of history and coughing and groaning
smiling radiantly
finally to wander to the stage full of electricity
but instead I watch the fog roll over the hill in rising crescendos

have seen perfect sunrises that seem to last an eternity while cheering on the dawn like pagans
in drunken rituals of debauchery
to arrive home beaten and tired but ready to howl at the moon if need be

called senators and congressman, high, demanding equal treatment
shouted from rooftops and into forests about my problems, national problems, rational problems, irrational problems
seeing no one listened I crouched in the corner and smoked

jacked off to illustrations of Molotov cocktails believing myself to be radical
just as the books told me I would
became who they said I would be when I swore I would be anything but

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Written by lickmypoetry

April 29, 2011 at 9:08 pm

Posted in poem, poetry

Tagged with , , ,

4 Responses

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  1. First, a question: On first line of the 2nd stanza, did you mean wandered or wondered? Both work, but if you meant wandered, I think you need to convince the reader it isn’t a typo. Perhaps by placing … after the word?

    This poem made me smile, cringe, laugh and FEEL my youth. It’s angry and pouting, flouting shit, wondering if anyone is listening and if they did, will they turn away or stay. Anarchy was a good tag word. Abandoned, angry and not ready to give up – ready to do it all again. Seeing the folly and the futility of being human. Good work!

    Cindy

    April 30, 2011 at 4:18 pm

    • Sweet thank you. I did mean wandered and liked it because it feels like it should be wondered. I think the ellipse is a good idea. I will add that.

      Great comment! Thank you!!!

      lickmypoetry

      April 30, 2011 at 5:23 pm

  2. “jacked off to illustrations of Molotov cocktails believing myself to be radical
    just as the books told me I would
    became who they said I would be when I swore I would be anything but”
    nasty and raw.
    great ending…

    Evelyn

    May 5, 2011 at 10:45 am

    • Thanks, I was actually considering changing the order a little to put “have seen perfect sunrises…” as the ending, but you have convinced me otherwise.

      Thanks!

      lickmypoetry

      May 5, 2011 at 1:20 pm


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